Modish Biz Tips

Take a pause. Be present. Breathe.

{cute gocco print by Argyle Whale}

I suggest we all take a moment on this lovely day to just slow down a bit. Be still. Be mindful. Be present.

I think all too often our minds are consumed with the past (all those things we didn't do, should have done, could've done better) and the future (all the to-dos, plans, schedules, things we still need to get done.) But while our brains are busy being consumed with thoughts, our bodies are here in the present moment, doing all they can do to keep up with the tasks that our over-active minds put upon them.

And yes, goals and lists and plans are good, otherwise it'd be nearly impossible to get anything done. But it's also good to pause and reset every once in awhile.

Think of your brain like a computer: it needs to shutdown sometimes to clear out its RAM (the energy and space it takes to run all the windows that are open, all the applications running, everything going on in the background, etc.) so it can focus better on the task at hand. It can get overwhelmed, overheated by trying to access and organize and process all the data that it's constantly inundated with. And often, all it takes to get your computer running more efficiently, is just to turn it off for a bit. For 5 minutes, 15 minutes...

So I suggest we take a moment to turn our brains "off" too. Shut them down. We need a moment to catch up with ourselves. To stop the in and outflow of data. A moment to just be, here in the present moment.

If you're up for hitting the reset button on your brain, continue on for a super easy guided meditation that you can do sitting right there at your desk.

I suffer from "Yes Syndrome." Do you?

{photo collage by favspotting}

Lately, I've been saying yes to every little work-related opportunity that comes my way. And by lately, I mean the past two years since I've been self-employed. :) "Can you write this for me?" Yes! "Can you design this for me?" Sure! "Can you be part of this for me?" Of course!

This is partially motivated by money: as a freelancer, it's hard to say no to an opportunity that will bring in some income when you don't know when another one may come, especially in this poor economy. And, as a smart marketer, it's hard to say no to an opportunity that can bring traffic or exposure and, in turn, potential income down the line.

But I think a majority of my "yes syndrome" comes from an emotional place: a place that honestly feels guilty if I say no to someone, a place that wants to prove to myself that I can handle whatever comes my way, a place that feels woeful at the thought of disappointing anyone, anytime, ever. Yes, it's that dramatic (in my mind.)

And then there are those times when all my yeses collide into a mass of deadlines that all need to get done at the same time. That's when I start to worry that my work won't be at it's best or that I really won't get everything done or that (shudder) it appears I cannot handle whatever comes my way.

That's when I realize, too many yeses can make that pot of opportunity boil over into a spilled mess.

When saying yes to something means having extra grocery money, but losing a bit of your sanity in the process, than perhaps a friendly, but firm, no is the way to go.

I say no all the time in my personal life, but sadly it's usually something like, "No, I can't go have fun right now because I'm too busy working." So how can I find the balance between saying no to some work opportunities while still having enough money to pay rent and potentially say yes to some fun activities every once in awhile?

I'm afraid I don't have the answer to any of this, just sort of throwing it out there as a topic of discussion.

How about you? Do you ever find yourself taking on too much at once because you just couldn't say no? How do you negotiate saying no to something that can bring in income, or provide you valuable exposure? Ever feel guilty in saying no to a project or work opportunity?

Do you need a supportive relationship to make a successful business?

{photo by Auzigog}

A wonderful Modish reader, Laura, wrote in this morning with a question that really piqued my interest, as it's something I've never actually thought about before... She's an entrepreneur working on getting her business off the ground, and as she reads about all these other successful entrepreneurial women, she's noticed a trend- they all seem to have very supportive husbands/boyfriends/partners in their lives.

But she doesn't.

Hmm, where are all the single ladies at?

If you look at the past interviews in the Do What You Love archives, you'll notice that all the women that have been featured so far mention their boyfriends and husbands as a means for support, either emotionally or financially, or just the person they rely on to have dinner with at the end of the day, share ideas with and remind them how great they are from time to time.

Marichelle over at Heart Handmade even has a whole series dedicated to the supportive men behind the scenes of phenomenal business women, because well, there's a lot of them! (Mine included!)

Competition, Resentment and Letting your Ego get in the way

{illustration by tommy the pariah. Are you your own worst enemy?}

I think there comes a point in every creative person's work life (or every person's every day life) when you may feel like you're not being valued. Like you're good enough, you're smart enough and gosh darnit, people like you, yet you're still not being recognized for all the hard work you do. What gives?

I think this feeling happens when you start getting too worried about what your competition is up to.

It's easy to compare yourself to your competitors in a way that becomes detrimental. When you start to view them as being "more successful" than you, in whatever your personal measures of success may be, you can find yourself right up against a fit of anger, jealousy and resentment.

I know, I've been there, I've felt it before. I've been in the place where I felt like all my ideas were being "copied" by others, like I wasn't been recognized for doing this first, or doing that better. I felt like I put so much hard work into something and where was my credit? My prize? My gold star that said, job well done!

I'm sure you've felt that little voice inside you too. The voice that creeps in to ask "How has she made 500 sales on etsy?" or "why is that person getting written up on so many blogs?" or "how the heck did he get so successful when my stuff is way better?" And you know what that horrible little bugger of a voice inside you is?

Your ego.

Are you selling your creative inspiration away?

{photo by Lumaahh. Painting the sky? Priceless.}

There's a definite romanticism attached to people who are able to make a living off their creative talents. I hear all the time how jealous people are of my being able to stay home all day and make my schedule as I please and just write and design and follow wherever my little creative muse takes me. Oh how glorious! Oh how wonderful it must be! Right?

Well, wrong. Although there are many incredible things about being able make money by pursuing your passions, it's definitely not as idealistic as it seems. When you start to make a living off your creative endeavors, when you start to literally sell your talents in art or writing or design, inevitably, there will be some days when doing the thing that you love to do so much just feels like another J.O.B.

The jewelry making that used to be your escape is a lot different when you get a big wholesale order and have to crank out 150 pieces. That painting that you made available as a print may be selling like hotcakes, but having to print it over and over again is a far cry from the feeling that inspired you to create the piece in the first place.

Selling your work is an awesome business to be in and an amazing way to be able to make some money, either on the side or as a full time gig. But when you mix your creative passion with marketing and promotion, money, deadlines and the constant feeling of needing to produce, it truly becomes a business.

So, how do you reconcile a creative hobby that has now become a source of income for you?

When You Feel Like you Just Don't Measure Up

{photo by Jek in the Box}

Being part of this incredible community of creative people, you're bound to find inspiration at every turn and people that you come to admire. Most often, that's a good thing, but there are inevitably some times when having all those amazing people directly surrounding you might start to make you feel like you don't quite measure up.

I think it's only natural, perhaps especially for women, to have moments when you feel like nothing you do is ever quite good enough. Moments when you feel like you can't handle what's on your plate as it is and then you find someone with platters full of food, piled all on top of each other, and somehow, they seem to be able to eat it all and still have room for dessert? How do they do it?!

From the time that I was running a jewelry business out of my bedroom on the side of a full time job until now, 4 years later, as I'm trying to manage my (now 3?) blogs, I have felt those feelings of inadequacy lingering in the back of my mind. I find myself comparing what I seem to be able to accomplish, to what the amazing people I come across each day seem to be able to accomplish. And for some reason, I often feel like I fall short.

There's always someone smarter, faster and more talented in some way with their hands stirring way more pots than you are ever going to be able to stir (and maybe they can even cook and keep their house clean too! Ugh!) And as much as that little bugger in the back of your mind reminds you of that, you can't let it detour you from the path you've chosen for yourself, and the speed at which you take it. You know why?